First look at "Spiderman" reboot

Being a girl and a proud nerd, I have to say that this picture is all kinds of awesome. (Grabbed from Entertainment Weekly, if you want to see it even bigger and better quality). Like I mentioned in a previous post, although I think the Sam Raimi movies are, for the most part, great movies, I am really looking forward to the reboot. I do hope they avoid going too into the recent dark "Batman" territory. "Batman" fits nicely into the gritty, post-modern superhero genre. But what I like about the first two "Spiderman" movies is how much fun they are. They're light, summer blockbuster, rip-roarin' good times at the theater. Also, "Spiderman" is still kind of a campy story. You still have the origin story about the spider bite and wacky weird villains. I would hate to see the new movie take a fun comic book premise and take it way too seriously when it absolutely does not have to.

Some people were apparently concerned about Andrew Garfield's ability to play a high schooler. I think he can definitely pull it off. Tobey Maguire wasn't exactly a kid when he took on the role. I liked Maguire just fine, but he was never my favorite part of those movies. Not to mention the fact that, unlike Maguire, Garfield is actually cute. Emma Stone is playing the new love interest. Once again, Kirsten Dunst was never my favorite part of the movies, but I didn't hate her. Between "The Social Network" and "Easy A," Garfield and Stone generated a lot of positive buzz in 2010. I'm more concerned about who will be writing and who will be directing. Director Marc Webb's big claim to fame is "(500) Days of Summer," but aside from that, he just has a ton of music videos on his resume. The people behind the screenplay are likewise pretty unknown. The previous "Spiderman" flicks had a screenwriter and a director with solid, well-known bodies of work behind them. Let's hope the newbies can prove themselves worthy of Spidey.

I guess the last big question for die-hard fans is this - to organically web-shoot or not to organically web-shoot? I'm a nerd in many ways but I'm no comic book nerd so I have no strong opinion one way or the other. I like the look of organic web-shooters, but if it's such a big deal, cede to the fanboys on this point.

In Theaters: "Black Swan"

The trailers: (see "True Grit" review)

The film: I've wanted to see this one for a while now and, to my surprise and delight, it got a wide release. "Black Swan" is not for sensitive or squeamish people. It's a very visceral film and contains more disturbing, gross-out images than Darren Aronofsky's previous ick flick "Requiem for a Dream." I loved that this movie actually leaves a mark on you when you watch it. The climactic final act completely had me (figuratively) on the edge of my seat. I particularly enjoyed the fact that the film never spells out for you what was part of main character Nina's madness and what was real. You're left at the end still questioning if her alternate Lily really was scheming for her position or was just an innocent fellow dancer caught up in Nina's spiral.

As far as the accusations of camp go, this is definitely a love-it-or-hate-it film. You either totally buy into it or you don't. Personally, I wholeheartedly believe that the movie perfectly straddles the line between drama and melodrama. The film is told entirely from Nina's point of view and therefore everything must be interpreted through her mind. If everything didn't take place through her eyes, then I could probably be convinced that this movie was overly melodramatic or cheesy. But you're seeing the events through the eyes of a naive, childlike, innocent young dancer who faces immense pressure from large, threatening figures who slowly manage to change her at her very core. I don't think this movie is high-minded trash or enjoyable camp. I think it's a movie that takes an uncomfortable, sometimes awkwardly funny, subject very seriously. I can see how many people would be turned off by it.

This is Nina's movie, and therefore it is Natalie Portman's movie and she more than rises to the occasion. You get to watch this woman go from admiring her icon from afar to changing who she is to be "perfect." The scene where Nina sits at retiring dancer Beth's mirror and picks up the lipstick is a perfect insight into who she is when her transformation begins. She is like a little girl, sheltered by her mother and pure in her passion. By the end, she has sacrificed the "sweet girl" she was to be the dynamic, sinister Black Swan. Her struggle to become the Black Swan is the most important thing to her. For her, the performance is her life and she is invested in every way imaginable to reaching the primal passion that Lily exudes so easily. It's about more than just performing the piece, it's about becoming it. "Lose yourself." Lily is "imprecise, but effortless. She's not faking it." The sexuality in the film, which may strike some as excessive, crass, or nothing but male fantasy is used to show Nina's dark maturation. Seduction is a big theme here.

I have to say that "Black Swan" did for "Swan Lake" what "Shakespeare in Love" did for "Romeo and Juliet" - it made me want to go out and see the original. Who says movies are low art? Both of these movies gave me a newfound appreciation and perspective on what I previously saw as old, stuffy productions irrelevant to the modern person. Okay, maybe that's a tad strong, but it gives me a new appreciation for ballet and theater.

I enjoy psychological thrillers and while "Black Swan" isn't the most subtle of examples, it's still a remarkable, fascinating film worth seeing.

My grade: A

ABC Wednesday - nutty neighbors, dopey doves, and product placement

"Modern Family" - Slow Down Your Neighbors"Modern Family" returned with a strong episode this week that revolved mainly around crazy (and crazy hot) neighbors. James Marsden guest starred as the hot tub intruder Barry while Claire fought to slow down a reckless speeder. Meanwhile, Jay tried to teach Gloria to overcome her fear and ride a bike. Each storyline was solid and had plenty of hilarious gems. Honestly, I can take or leave the stunt casting. But that being said, Marsden was still fun. And still smoking hot. I loved Mitchell and Cam's pre-credits sequence.

Best Quotes:

Cam: "Mitchell, there's a stranger in our hot tub!
Mitchell: "Who is it?"
Cam: "You do know what 'stranger' means, don't you?"
Mitchell: "Oh my god, how long has he been there?"
Cam: "I saw him exactly one second before you, you know everything I know."
Mitchell: "Okay, I'm calling 911."
Cam: "I'm getting my bat."
(They get a good look at 'the stranger')
Mitchell: "Maybe we're overreacting."
Cam: "Yeah, he could have a very good reason."
Mitchell: "We should at least say 'hello.'"
Cam: "It's only polite."

I have to say that they use Luke perfectly on this show. He's turning into my favorite Dunphy.
Luke (scoffing): "Police. Order a pizza and call the cops, we'll see who gets here first."

Phil: "'Luke, I am your father!' That's what I said to you when you were coming out of your mom's lady parts."

Claire trying to remember the car's license number while Phil wrote down an address was great. "Okay, 10-4. This could be my best year since 2006!"

Jay: "Two-thirds of my house can't do what a billion Chinese do."

Phil: "Bring it, Laura. You want to test me? I've been tested my whole life. They could never find anything."

Cam: "You do this every time we meet a new friend. They say one thing you don't like and you just write them off."
Mitchell: "I do not!"
Cam: "Oh really? What about 'But-Yet Rachel'?"
Mitchell: "'I'd love to go, but yet I don't feel like parking.' It's either 'but' or 'yet', not both!"
Cam: "You're lucky no one's kicked your butt, yet. What about Thomas? You wrote him off because he serves the salad after the meal. Which, by the way, is very common in Europe."
Mitchell: "What part of Europe is he from? Pretentious-stan?"
Cam: "Okay, fine, keep judging. Don't let anyone in. I could care less."
Mitchell: "I think you mean you couldn't care less because if you could care less it means that you care a little bit."
Cam: "All right. I'm going into the hot tub. If I stay in here one more minute my head is literally gonna explode."
Mitchell: "Well I hope not because if you mean literally-"
Cam: "-I don't feel safe in my own home!

Mitchell (about his tendency to roll his eyes): "I once saw a picture of myself at a friend's poetry slam, and all you could see were the whites of my eyes."

Jay: "We're riding bikes, we're not training police dogs."

Luke as a teacher was my favorite thing in this episode.
Luke (offering to teach Gloria to ride a bike): I never taught anyone anything. But my playdate canceled, so I was wide open.

Phil: "I wish I were one of those people who thrives on the danger of leading a double life - you know, Bruce Wayne, Peter Parker, Hannah Montana."

Phil: "Claire was furious. She said I betrayed her on every level. So, I called the florist, and I have ordered one dozen Mylar balloons. Good luck staying mad, honey!"


"Cougar Town" - No Reason to Cry
"Cougar Town" is still at the top of its game, silly and quirky as ever. I'm so happy to have the Cul-de-Sac Crew back! I loved the running gag of Andy and Ellie providing fake names to screw the other person over. At first I thought that they were a one-note couple, but they're really cute together. Especially when they're trying to escape "Jules' friend prison." The changing of the coffee sizes was fantastic as well and I knew instantly I had to include Laurie's entire speech for the quotes section. I wish the Emmys or someone official would recognize how awesome Busy Phillips is on this show.

I know the whole Diet Dr. Pepper product placement is going to ruffle feathers among people who go crazy over that sort of thing. To them I say 'get over it!' I rather a show do product placement like this than awkwardly make the characters suddenly all drink the same drink all the time. I thought it made perfect sense in context, for the character of Bobby as well as in the context of him wanting a sponsorship for his golfing. I loved Travis' little "is someone filming this?" comment as Bobby went on about Diet Dr. Pepper. I think people overreact anytime any real product is mentioned or shown in a positive light. I know I've gladly extolled the virtues of Coca Cola before and I don't find it unrealistic for a person to talk about a drink they love. If you can't just do the lingering shots of certain brand names on a show, then I prefer the writers try to be a little creative about it. I was never bothered by the "Chuck" Subway product placement because I know people who willingly rave about the place. Just be happy that primetime shows aren't nearly as awkward as soap operas are with their product placement.

Best Quotes:

Title this week was a long one! "New Year's Resolution: Embrace Our Stupid Title & Lose Six Pounds "Cougar Town" (We love it!)"

Jules: "It's so cool that you and Kirsten are staying for a movie."
Travis: "You said if I didn't, you wouldn't give me money for food."
Jules: "Just say 'you're welcome,' dude."

Jules: "Oh, sweetie, Grayson and I are a better couple than you."
Travis: "Well this sounds like a healthy road to go down with your mom."

Jules: "Grayson, pop quiz! What is my favorite food? What makes me really sad? Who's my celebrity crush?"
Grayson: "Veal, veal again, and Vince Vaughn."
Jules: "Nailed it!"
(Later)
Grayson: "How many did I really get right?"
Jules: "None, but you knew to lie and that's why we work!"

Bobby: "You see those guys over there? One of them just might be a Diet Dr. Pepper executive."
Travis: "Or just a doctor with the last name Pepper. I mean, the odds are about the same."

Tom (after the dove/frying pan collision): "Did someone have a pillow fight out here?...Whoa, there's a dead bird. And a real sad one right next to it."

Andy: "I know it sucks. But this is what happens when doves cry."

Travis: "My dad isn't just my dad. He's part of the Cul-de-Sac Crew. You meddle with one of them, the entire group responds. They're a collective consciousness, like the Children of the Corn."

Jules (after Grayson isn't appropriately sad about the dove dying): "If it was a person, would you still make jokes?"
Grayson: "Probably, because it meant they died sprinting into a frying pan."
Jules: "I bet that's how Bobby goes."

Bobby, while freaking out about the world, screws up his putt. "Will the Internet ever be safe again? Some experts say NO!" And I loved that all the next putt needed was a "DARFUR!" to get shaken. And later, "yeah baby! The world sucks but who cares!"

A perfect example of the difference between men in women in relationships:
Jules: "You get why murdering two animals would make me spiral right?"
Grayson: "I don't."
Jules: "Deep down, you're probably feeling just as sad as I am."
Grayson: "I'm not."
Jules: "You're gonna change someday."
Grayson: "I won't."

Grayson: "You know, I think you're a little emotional right now so I think the smart thing for us to do would be to just chill, not get into any deep conversations."
Jules: "Do you even think we're right for each other?"
Grayson: "Thanks for listening."

Grayson: "Put Big Carl down."
Jules: "No, he understands me!"

Kirsten: "Are we really at a dead lizard's funeral in your mom's yard?"
Travis: "You did this to us."

Grayson (to Jules): "You're an idiot. You're worried that we're not alike enough to be together. One of my favorite things about us is how different we are. It's the couples that are different that really work. I mean, look at these freaks (to Ellie and Andy). His favorite movie is "Die Hard." And she's a horrible person. I've been scared to say this, but all those ways that you're different from me...that's why I love you. I love you Jules."

And now, Laurie's crazy brilliant order at the coffee shop! You can tell they had so much fun with this one and Busy Phillips handles it wonderfully. (It's on Youtube, too, if you feel like watching it)
Laurie: "Oh hey Rache, now bear with me, I have to order for everyone. Okay, I'll have one Soy Largey, one teeny tiny, one teeny teeny tiny unleaded, one Plain Jane, extra yum, (what the hell make it a double yum), a Baby Joey, a Midnight with a Full Moon - hold the pumpkin, a medium coffee, I need a Heavy D in a travel mug please, two Crazy Ivans, a Sauron's Eye. Also I need a 'Damn!' and an iced 'Damn!', a Sneaky Pete, a double drip with a snip of whip, and a frap cap heavy on the (makes crushing sound). Oh, and let's see what's fresh...okay, well I'll take three raisin happy muffins, a French mustache, and, ick, a fart muffin - that is not for me. Oh, and I forgot to order my own coffee! Can I get a Taye Diggs, which is black and extra strong and smooth but also very sweet?" (Barista stands frozen in place) "Would it be easier if I just came back there and made it myself?"

In Theaters: "True Grit"

The trailers: I saw three movies in one day and I wasn't exactly taking notes, so I am not even going to attempt to list the upcoming releases I heard about. They were mostly forgettable though. Not surprising, since we're headed into the post-Holiday Death Valley that is the movie climate in the early new year.

The film: Several people I know saw "True Grit" recently and highly recommended it. Westerns aren't really my favorite type of movie, but I'll enjoy any type of movie if it's done well. The "3:10 to Yuma" remake is a fantastic movie and I would recommend it to most people, even those who don't care for Westerns. But in the case of "True Grit," I really do think there is a disconnect to some degree between the quality of the film versus my personal enjoyment of the film. For some movies, quality and personal entertainment don't match up. A movie's quality is very objective and can be analyzed the same way by everyone. But a movie's entertainment ability is very subjective and can differ from person to person. For example, I think "Blade Runner" is an excellent movie. However, I don't like it much and find it rather boring and morose. On the other side of things, I openly admit that I enjoy watching "Ace Ventura" movies. They aren't good movies by any stretch of the imagination, but through nostalgia and a (sometimes) juvenile sense of humor, I like them. Through this preface, you can probably infer by now that I didn't love "True Grit." The best word I can use is "underwhelming."

It was a good enough adaptation of a novel that was already adapted into what I hear is a good film. The cast, including Jeff Bridges and Matt Damon, is capable, although the only one who truly shines is the young Hailee Steinfeld as Mattie Ross. She handles her role very well for her age and holds her own among bigger name stars. Josh Brolin, as much I love him, is in the movie for what felt like five minutes. Bridges and Damon are good, but really, do you expect anything less than that from them?

My biggest issue with the movie revolves around its pacing. It spends a great deal of time in town, establishing Mattie Ross as a headstrong, intelligent young woman. While I enjoyed the verbal wit and crisp writing, in retrospect I wish they had focused more on the journey than the build-up to the journey. She then manages to get the team together, lots of manly pissing matches ensue, they follow one or two leads to find Brolin's character before the trail goes cold, miraculously stumble upon him, and kill him in a very abrupt climax. I felt like the movie wanted to have a big emotional ending that it just didn't quite earn. Considering the subject matter, two big things that were missing were any sense of urgency and a sense of danger. But maybe this is supposed to be all about the characters, not their man-hunt. The characters all come to respect each other by the end, but I just didn't buy it. For a movie that is almost two hours long, it felt incredibly short to me. Also, aside from the snippets of humor, there wasn't much about it that was very Coen brothers-esque. Sure, the film is beautifully made as well, but once again, do you expect any less from the Coen brothers? Perhaps without the big name cast and the Coen brothers behind the scenes, this movie wouldn't have gotten nearly as much as buzz. Personally, I feel like you could have put entirely unknown actors in the roles and gotten the same exact movie.

A lot of this boils down to personal opinion, I suppose, since the majority of people out there loved "True Grit." I'm no professional, this is all just my humble opinion. And in my humble opinion, there's nothing special about this respectful and well-done yet dull adaptation.

My grade: C-

"Southland" hits its stride and finds stability on TNT

"Police officers often find themselves frustrated with the limitations of the legal system. Sometimes cops have to improvise."
After being mishandled by NBC and transferred to another network, the first season of "Southland" completely produced for cable premiered this Tuesday with a top-notch episode. If you haven't tuned in before, I don't think it's a problem jumping in now. You lose a little character development from the earlier episodes, but due to its procedural nature, there are no big ongoing storylines to be confused by.

My favorite description of the show I've read so far is by Entertainment Weekly, who called it a "procedural with the soul of a serial drama" when recommending it. The show also has a healthy dose of realism to it that you often don't get on network television. And I don't just mean that in reference to its grittiness. The scene where Lydia tells Russell about her new partner was a great example of one of the best things the show does - it takes small, everyday moments and focuses on them, as they are often the big moments in day to day life. I particularly enjoyed Ben and John trying to settle a sales dispute, the kind of mundane stuff that doesn't make headlines but does make up a good portion of street level police work.

This episode had some great writing as well, from "better live pussies than dead heroes" to "she needed a restraining order, not a hug." Another favorite of mine was from a neighborhood local being interviewed by the detectives regarding a murder, telling the detectives that "this isn't a fucking whodunit. Everyone in this neighborhood knows whodunit." The show isn't shy about the real life limitations of the legal system either, as the opening voiceover points out. When discussing the spate of murders of women, Lydia says, exasperated, that "if they were killing Muslims like this, everybody...they'd be protesting and trying to pass bills in Congress." Detectives Bryant and Moretta also struggle with the imperfections when finding out why some gangbangers walk free after gang raping a girl. Bryant asks why they were acquitted, to which Moretta explains "she was drunk."

I highly recommend "Southland," especially if you're like me and you're going through withdrawal. There seems to be a shortage of good TV right now as we're kind of in a transition period between great big TV dramas. Phenoms "Lost" and "24" ended this year and the next big thing hasn't been found yet. Meanwhile, the 2010 fall season is the weakest in recent memory for new shows. So if you need a new fix of quality TV, check into "Southland" on Tuesdays at 10 on TNT.

"V" returns, revitalized and ready to get back into action

I don't know if it's too late for "V" to recover from its rocky first season, but its return last night certainly bodes well. Maybe it's too late for it to catch on or be renewed, but I have high hopes for the direction of the rest of the season. Not that the show is anything amazing, but I don't think it's as campy or terrible as people say it is. It's enjoyable for what it is, and last night we got a lot of exposition and the pace picked up. Really, I'm just happy to have another SciFi show out there that is entertaining even if it's not outright enthralling.

It seems like forever, but things picked up right where they left off - Chad Decker discovering the truth about the Vs, Anna turning the sky red, etc. I think they really utilized each character to the right amount in this episode. Elizabeth Mitchell's Erica Evans is still a bit of a bore and the only moments where she gets to shine are when she talks with Anna. Outside of those scenes where she gets to be a headstrong mother and a steadfast resistance fighter on board the ship, she's rather dull and I'm glad they're expanding the cast. Like Erica, a lot of the other characters have this problem of being personality-less. They have designated roles but they aren't very realistic. And you know what? I'm okay with that. This isn't a deep show and some of the characters are entertaining even if they aren't very lifelike. Luckily, Father Jack got very little screentime and most of it actually centered around the Fifth Column storyline and therefore wasn't as useless as his time normally is. It makes me sad that he's such a bore as well since I loved Joel Gretsch on "The 4400." But I like that Chad Decker is in the know and has to grapple with his guilt as well as the pressure of acting like he knows nothing.

The one human character I liked the most is Hobbes, the British mercenary. Well, now I have another human to root for on this show - Bret Harrison's Sidney. I've missed him since "Reaper" ended. Hobbes' declaration to Sidney that he was now working for the Fifth Column was great - "and if you say no, we'll kill you. Relax, I'm kidding. Maybe."

But my favorite characters are still the Vs fighting on our side. Ryan returned, but luckily the rest of the group wasn't moronic and actually questioned why he escaped so easily and what his true motivations are. Joshua was revived, but due to amnesia problems it looks like that was just a quick stunt and he isn't really back. Or maybe they'll go daring and have him report to Anna that Lisa was acting strangely and the friend will turn into a foe. And then we'll get to see his true nature to sympathize with humans resurface and we'll actually get to see him struggle with his loyalties. But that's only in my dreams, if they decided to capitalize on their one awesome character. Aside from him, though, Lisa is turning into my favorite character. She's in the most precarious position and is dealing with the highest stakes. She is embracing her feelings for Tyler and trying to protect him but she has to follow her mother's orders as well. I wish Tyler wasn't such an oblivious horny moron though. But Lisa's big turn to actually helping the Fifth Column is a big deal and I find her to be the most intriguing character, morally. Unfortunately, the more Lisa grows the more obvious it is that Tyler is painfully underdeveloped. I have a feeling the actor doesn't have the chops to pull off much more, though. Like her daughter, Anna is also getting more interesting with her struggle with human emotions. I'm not sure why the human skin also endows them with emotions, but I like the drama it brings. Watching Anna deal with her emotions by becoming more of a cruel bitch was a neat inversion of what her daughter is doing. You can't just give peace a chance, Anna? Come on, all you need is love! Do you really have to populate Earth? There isn't another planet out there you can use?

Another thing I noticed about this episode was that is was really gruesome. Red rain, tearing apart V leaders, Tyler getting his face ripped off (alas, only in a dream sequence)? I think this show borders on cheese without going overboard and I'm really enjoying the balance. It's just cheesy enough without being campy, although it could use some lightening up as it gets a little too morose sometimes. Alien invasions aren't a day at the park, I know, but they can be serious and still riveting.

After watching "V" and seeing a promo for TNT's "Falling Skies," I really want a show where aliens actually do come in peace. They would be screwed because we would never believe them and it would probably end up as a "District 9" type situation, but I would like to see something different.

So I guess the new big development is the phosphorous in the red rain and its ties to V breeding. It's a very elaborate plan full of a lot of work just to breed more Vs, so I have a hard time believing that's all they want - to populate the Earth with Vs, or make humans give birth to Vs, or whatever. And apparently Erica had some phosphorous issues when she was pregnant, leading her to get a blood test with Sidney to learn more. I have a question that's been bugging me - how bad is it to just slice your hand open with a knife? Couldn't Erica have just taken blood the old fashioned way? Lots of movies and TV shows (like the first "Pirates of the Caribbean" movie for example) show characters slitting their palm to get blood. Does a wound there clot that easily? Wouldn't that hurt like crazy for a while? It just doesn't seem practical or healthy. And now that I've rambled on needlessly about something no one else thinks about, I'll sum things up again - I'm enjoying this show for what it is and hope the rest of the season is as enjoyable as this episode was.

My failed New Year's resolution - Tvgirl vs. "Buffy the Vampire Slayer"

I'm not much for resolutions, but as 2009 turned into 2010, I made a pop culture resolution that I thought was a worthwhile venture. I resolved to watch all of "Buffy the Vampire Slayer." After I realized that there are several crossover episodes with its spin-off "Angel," I resolved to watch that as well. People rave about these shows and frequently cite "Buffy" as one of the best TV shows of all time. I adored Joss Whedon's "Firefly" and I enjoy the horror/supernatural genre, so it seemed like a no-brainer that I would fall in love with these two shows like everyone else. Well, I'm sad to report that I failed. I could only get about four and a half seasons in until I couldn't take it anymore. I made it through some of the first season of "Angel" but dropped that because I couldn't acquire the rest of it, not because I couldn't stand it. But I dropped "Buffy" because the things I disliked about it outnumbered the things I liked about it. So just what is it that I found so insufferable about "Buffy" while everyone else adores it? (Feel free to yell at me all you want. Or explain to me why I should stick with it and what I'm missing, which would be more helpful.)

Buffy Summers
Sorry, I don't like the Slayer. I find Sarah Michelle Gellar kind of annoying in this role and I tired quickly of her. I also got tired of her "serious" acting, which basically involves talking in a soft, hurt voice. I think a lot of this dislike comes from the intense pressure I feel to think of Buffy as a badass female role model who I should worship. Yeah, she kicks ass, but she isn't very bright and has others do the brainwork for her. And I know she's a teenage girl, but she gets really moody, cocky, bratty and insensitive and I don't have the patience for it I suppose. I also have an issue with the clever dialogue coming out of her mouth (as well as Xander's, but he'll get his soon enough). On "Firefly," the dialogue was full of slang and wit but it was set in an entirely different, future setting. "Gilmore Girls" as well as "Veronica Mars," to a certain extent, had witty dialogue but the characters were very intelligent and worldly. Buffy is just a petulant kid, so the dialogue comes off more cutesy and attempting to be hip than organically clever.

Xander and Anya
Same goes for Xander regarding the dialogue. I cannot stand Xander. He's an annoying, quippy, useless person in their little group. And then he has his little romance with Anya, another annoying character. I know it's a common suspension of disbelief regarding ages of actors playing teens, but there's a scene where Anya tries to order a drink at a bar and gets turned down because of her age. It's supposed to be hilarious. I'm sorry, but she looked like she was 35. These two together really drag down the show for me. Maybe I could just fastforward through their scenes? The only time I actually like Xander is when he grows a pair and tells the hard truth about a situation or character that needs to be said. But then he goes back to being plain old "lovable" Xander.

Angel
I never knew that the whole Edward Cullen/Bella Swan thing was a complete rip-off of the Angel/Buffy romance. God, I couldn't wait for their boring relationship to end. Or at least for Angelus to come back. Angel was such a bore and a downer. Until he got his own show, that is. Once he got his own show he was a much better character. But on "Buffy" he seemed to suck the life out of every scene he was in.

The excessively quippy dialogue
Like I said earlier, I think Joss Whedon's writing on "Firefly" really worked. But the quips and the "hip" dialogue just starts to make my ears burn on this show. I don't know how Giles keeps it together around these kids. I can actually understand now why some people don't like "Gilmore Girls," although the whip-smart dialogue on that show wasn't coming out of the mouths of dopey teenagers.

The stupid people of Sunnydale
Another element that really tests by ability to suspend disbelief. Any "Buffy" fan is aware of this infamous plot issue, so I won't bother explaining it, but the people of Sunnydale are absolute morons. Sure, they had that scene at the dance or prom or whatever honoring Buffy as Class Protector, but it didn't seem like enough. I guess Sunnydale has a "don't ask, don't tell" policy for the supernatural. They don't even bother to do a half-assed mass amnesia like "Smallville" always did. The death rate must not faze anyone either. It's like "Murder, She Wrote," where half the town is evil and the other half ends up as dead victims of the evil ones.

Those scheming, nefarious villains
I got really sick of having a new Bond-esque demon plotting the world's destruction in a cave somewhere underneath Sunnydale. Every new villain was going to bring about the end of the world. But when every villain claims to be high stakes, it makes the threats less tangible every time. I grant "Buffy" a little wiggle room with the cheesy villains because it was produced on the WB during the 90s. But I felt like I was watching the supernatural version of "24," where Jack Bauer kills the Big Bad, only to be told "you think this stops here? You have no idea who you're dealing with. Wait until you meet my boss. He's even badder! This isn't over!"

The logic of the Slayer mythos
So there's only one Slayer for the entire world? There really isn't any evil in the rest of the world? Or maybe evil just goes unchecked everywhere outside of Sunnydale? But of course Sunnydale has the Hellmouth, so it does have more evil. Who picks the Slayer? The Powers that Be? Is there any rhyme or reason to it? Why can there only be one? There's a whole lot of evil out there and the deck is really stacked against the side of good if we only get one chosen fighter. All the other cities dealing with vampires just get to suffer I guess.

That empty library
This is another infamous sticking point among fans, but in the high school years, why is no one ever in that damn library? I know it wouldn't work if it was a highly trafficked area, but it's not exactly a secure meeting location. Maybe that's why Sunnydale students are so dumb. They never go to to the library to study, and even if they did, all the books would be about ancient texts and evil creatures.

Why didn't Buffy and Willow just room together in college to begin with?
The fourth season sends the gang off to college and hilarity ensures when Buffy and Willow must deal with horrible roommates. Why didn't they just room together? Maybe because then they couldn't have the contrived storyline about Buffy's evil roommate?

Now that everyone hates me, I will list some things I do like about "Buffy." Because there are some things that I enjoy about this show.

The Initiative
I dropped the show about halfway through the fourth season so I never got the resolution to the whole Adam thing, but I liked that this was the season where "Buffy" fully embraced its campiness. It was like, "screw it, there's a secret government facility under the college! Just go with it!" The whole thing was so ridiculous I couldn't help but love it.

Computer nerds were still, well, nerds
Because it's a show from the 90s, no one knows how to use a computer but the one nerdy friend. This amused me to no end.

Giles
I love Giles. He's smart, experienced, and can actually fight when he needs to. The addition of Wesley served to make Giles look cooler by comparison, but I loved him before that.

Cordelia
I was kind of pissed when she left the show. She was a spoiled teen but at least she was honest and spoke her mind. She wasn't a complete cliche either like I expected. She's the beautiful popular girl but she also does well in school. She seemed like a much more realistic character to me as she was a young girl craving attention and popularity despite being strong and smart. Buffy just comes across as a petulant child to me. Cordelia was destined for greatness. I haven't seen much of "Angel," but her presence on that show can only mean good things.

Spike
I know he's a fan favorite and I can see why. His character absolutely embraces the camp of it all and seems like the only one actually having any fun. He adds that much-needed element because I honestly think the show isn't that fun without him. I should watch the rest of "Buffy" just to see him get more screentime. I much rather see him and Buffy throw down than Buffy and Angel.

So I've listed my main complaints and the few things that kept me with the show that long. I failed at my resolution. But for 2011, I think I'll renew it. Partly just to be able to say that I've seen the entire series. Partly to see if it gets any better. I kept waiting for it to take off and it finally caught on with me in the fourth season, but it didn't hook me strong enough. By the time I got to another episode with Danny Strong's character, I just couldn't bring myself to pick up the series again. I had better things to do anyway. But I want to see if any other season hooks me. I still haven't gotten to Evil Willow or "Once More, With Feeling" or "The Body," so maybe the great episodes come later. I certainly hope so. I started to get the feeling that this show is a lot like "Supernatural" or "Chuck," where it's a good show that is criminally overlooked and underrated so the rabid fan base talks it up so much that it gets a spot in TV history. I love these two shows but I think their greatness can be exaggerated by over-zealous fans, leading newcomers to think "well, this show is good, but nothing life changing." I think this is what's happening with me and "Buffy." It's fine, despite the 90s cheesiness, but not the extraordinary experience I've heard about. It's hard for a show to live up to the kind of hype "Buffy" gets. I wonder how much of the hype is due to nostalgia and how much is due to actual quality. Because I don't think the show is overrated crap, but I think the passing time and fond memories have helped lift it in the public consciousness.

I'm also going to try and pick up "Angel" again. I really liked it, despite the cruel decision to kill off Doyle so soon and sub in Wesley. The only reason I haven't watched "Angel" is because I can't manage to obtain it to watch it. But I like the darker, more serious tone and I love crossover episodes between shows, so I'll try to find it.

Maybe I'll fall in love with "Buffy," but I've been sitting through it for four seasons and I keep on waiting for it to grab me and become the iconic show I've been promised. Or maybe I'll still be bored with it and just watch "Firefly" for the billionth time instead.(Let the flogging commence)