"Lost" - I loved the series finale. I also hated it.

I think this is the first time I truly understand the meaning of the words "finale fever." I'm starting to recover and collect my thoughts though. I thought I'd tackle the most daunting finale first: "Lost." But how to do it? I could go the EW route and write a giant, philosophical essay about "what it all meant" and how poignant it all was. I could do bullet points and not even bother to form coherent sentences. I could do a stream of consciousness entry with plenty of expletives that would make JD Salinger proud. Well, I'm going to go ahead and write and you can be the judge of whether it makes sense or not. And I'll admit right now, I am not one of those crazed "Lost" fans who watches episodes a dozen times to search for hidden meaning and then consorts with their online cronies to discuss what it all means. I'm one of the fans who is along for the ride and enjoys it, but to a healthy degree. I say this in the intro as I have never seen the phrase "if you were a true fan..." bandied about so much before in my life as I have in "Lost" discussions these past few days.

I'm going to get right down to it. The revelation of the Sideways world as purgatory. More than that, it seemed to be more purgatory from Jack's point of view as it all went on. Everything that happened on the Island was real, Sideways world was not. This disappointed me immensely, and not just because it was what everyone sort of predicted in the beginning. It was almost like they went down the list of cliche series endings and said, "hmmm, well people really hate the 'it was all a dream' scenario. What's the next best thing? They all died!" I'll let that slide for the most part. If they had all died in the initial plane crash? That would have been unforgiveable. But I hated this reveal for a number of reasons. I thought one commentor summed it up the best: "If you're the Man of Faith, you loved the ending. If you're the Man of Science, you hated it." That's very black-and-white, but it's kind of true. I'm the (Wo)Man of Science, so it was admittedly frustrating for me to see the finale veer so much into the Faith territory. Until now, I thought the series had always done a good job of balancing the two and maintaining an interesting conflict. But in the end, Jack even admits that John Locke, Man of Faith, was right about almost everything. And then Jack discovers he is in Sideways world aka Purgatory and everyone is waiting for him so they can move on into the light. To many people, this is a very satisfying ending. For me, this was not the happy ending I was hoping for. For me, the Sideways world being real was satisfying. In that world, everyone got their happy endings with the people they loved. I viewed it as an alternate universe they created after the hydrogen bomb exploded and Desmond was brought in to help them snap back to that consciousness. All those reunions in Sideways world were incredibly touching so the purgatory revelation, to me, invalidated all those reunions. Going into the light is not a satisfying ending in my book. Getting your happily ever after is. Suddenly Juliet's sacrifice is meaningless. Suddenly Faraday looks like an idiot. For a show that took so much time explaining things in scientific terms, what with all the time travel and constants and electromagnetism, it felt like a cop-out to abandon logical explanations and settle on supernatural, spiritual forces.

Ignoring whether or not the ending was satisfying because of its focus on faith, I feel like the Sideways as purgatory storyline completely distracted people from all those other questions they had about the Island to begin with. It was established that everything that happened to Jack on the Island happened, so what about the Dharma Initiative? What about Widmore? What about the Others? What about the Light on the Island? What about Walt? What about WALT?!

Maybe it was naive of me, but I had hoped the writers knew what they were doing. I mean, I had hoped they had some ultimate blueprint for the narrative which is what prompted them to set a specific end date. I really believed that they had an explanation for these things, that they weren't just adding twists and mysteries just for the sake of being mysterious. A show that demonstrates what I had hoped is "Doctor Who," the new series. I know the seasons are much shorter, but they manage to have fun, adventure-of-the-week episodes with mythology thrown in. In the second episode of season 1, the first Bad Wolf reference is made. In the third season, the very first episode contains a Vote Saxon poster. Every season of "Doctor Who" has a clear narrative determined before they start writing themselves into corners. There are other shows that do this, and I had hoped that "Lost" would be one. That they would ultimately have some explanation that ties everything together about the mysteries of the Island. But no. Then comes the person who says "sit back, relax, of course they're not going to answer every question! How very demanding you are! Leave some things open to interpretation! Don't you see the genius in that?" But I don't think it's unreasonable to ask for some answers to make it seem like they weren't just throwing in lots of strange elements without a rhyme or reason. At some point, "leaving things open to interpretation" isn't genius and artsy, it's just not bothering to answer your questions.

Well, now that I've alienated any person who enjoyed the finale and thinks I'm an overly critical hateful shrew, I'd like to talk about some things I did like. As I said, I loved the series finale too. For the first two hours, in fact, when I still thought the main characters were going to transition into the Sideways world and get their happy endings, I really really loved the finale. Every awakening was emotionally powerful to watch. My favorite awakening was initially Jin and Sun's. Their death together was so jarring and unexpected that their awakening in the hospital, hearing that their baby was just fine and they were together and well was thrilling in its beauty. And then Sawyer and Juliet awoke near the hospital vending machines and it was even better. The juxtaposition with the scenes of Juliet's death and her new life, as it were, were fantastic. What a fool I was to think that so many characters would get their happy endings with their loved ones. I, like many other fans, had some problems with Sayid ending up with Shannon when Nadia was his true love, but it was so damn endearing that I let that slide. I was a little sad for Desmond, however, as he was too busy waking people up to have some grand reunion with Penelope. Their scenes together are always the most moving, but I guess with the Purgatory resolution it really wouldn't have made sense to stop everything and make it about them when, really, it ended up being all about Jack and his perspective. But the Kate, Claire, and Charlie awakening was just as touching as the others. I also loved that Lapidus, Sawyer, Miles, Kate, and Claire managed to get the plane off the Island. However, this was when I started getting confused and was forced to confront that my Sideways theory was most likely wrong. I also loved Sideways Kate pointing out the humor in Jack's dad being named "Christian Shepard." I loved the final shot of Jack's eye closing to end the show. I love that ABC admitted that the final shots of the Oceanic wreckage were tacked on as a breather before the news rather than parts of the show.

It's funny, writing this now and thinking back on what I THOUGHT was going to happen and what REALLY happened. I thought that the big ending would be that everyone gets to live. Everyone gets to live, everyone gets a happy ending, and people would complain because it was too perfect. But no. Everyone died. Not all at the same time, granted, but everyone was dead in the end. But in the eyes of the spiritual, the ending really was pretty happy. To believers, the ending was just. "Man of Faith is content here. So what's your problem, you cynical Man of Science? Why should the 'Lost' finale cater to your fringe beliefs?" Well, I am glad that the ending was emotionally resonant and had the ultimate theme of live together, die alone, but then move on into the light together too. But I'm a little let down that the finale had to get that divisive in the first place. Yes, no matter what it was, it would be divisive, but nothing is quite so polarizing as spirituality and religion. So inherent in the fact that they ended the series in a decidedly spiritual manner, it is likely to bother people who aren't of a spiritual inclination. I know many people who are not spiritual but still loved the finale and could still appreciate it. I think I can appreciate the beauty in the ending, even if it didn't completely satisfy me. I know that the Light in the church is supposed to be a good thing, so I should find solace in that. It's not MY happy ending, but it is a happy ending nonetheless.
Thanks for the memories, "Lost." You were never an obsession of mine, but you made the Top Ten list consistently. Now we just have to deal with all the annoying people asking what show is going to be the next "Lost." Which, I think, is unfair to any promising shows with great potential as people will assess it in terms of the "Lost" greatness formula. And no, none of them will be the next "Lost" because "Lost" is unique. But in terms of phenomenon, I'm sure something will come along in the near future. Who knows, what with "Glee" being renewed for a second and third season, maybe everyone will get onboard with that and people over the age of 23 will be head over heels about it. Or something amazing will come to HBO or Showtime or some other cable network that will have the creative vision and ingenuity to take the nation and world by storm. (I'm hoping for the latter.)